Well...it's Bolivia!

Last time I was in Bolivia, my friend, Andreas, and I found ourselves needing an explanation for all the ridiculous things that happened here that just didn’t make sense.  That applied to almost everything, and it turns out there was just no other explanation besides, “Well...it’s Bolivia!”  Three years later, the same holds true.  Crossing overland into Bolivia is as easy as driving up to a wooden shack in the middle of the desert where everyone parks willy-nilly and chats with each other while you take pictures of the volcanoes and put on some warmer clothes and maybe dig a snack out of the back of your 4x4, after which you go into the shack where your driver jokes with the guards who briefly glance at your passport and give you a stamp.  No searching, no bag checks, no sniffer dogs, not even a proper line up.

Yes, this is the border.

Obligatory Bolivian flat tire

The first thing we did in Bolivia was spend 3 days driving around weird, alien landscapes in a 4x4 driven by Wilson, who’s musical taste ranged from Bette Davis Eyes and Roxette to Spanish covers of Whitney and Celine.  A-ma-zing.  We were doing the Salt Flats tour which takes you through the highest and driest desert on the planet, the Atacama, where we drove past fields of volcanic rock, red lakes, bubbling mud geysers and families of flamingos eating algae from borax infested waters.  We were driving through a desert surrounded by mountains, and climbing to 5000 metres above sea level in an afternoon had us all suffering from altitude sickness that no amount of coca tea or tears could cure.  We all had raging migraines, stiff necks, restless legs, we couldn’t sleep and were popping Ibuprofen and Gravol like nobody’s business.  Although the rock hotel we stay at the first night was nestled right on the edge of the desert at the foot of a mountain and as we drove up in the rain I felt a little like an intrepid scientist heading to a remote research station on another planet.  

4 days of this

Enjoying the view from some natural hot springs

The highlight is seeing the Salar de Uyuni, the biggest salt flat in the world, 12,000km2 of bright, white salt that meets bright, white sky.  It burns your eyes.  Because there is no horizon, this is the place where you take those crazy pictures of you stomping on your friends or standing on top of a bottle of water.  Really, the pictures are the most fun part of a visit to the salar, and in this respect, having my parents as travel buddies was unfortunate for me because between Dad’s bad eyesight and Mom’s general inability to take a picture in focus, I only got one decent shot.  Plus, our afternoon spent on the glaring white salt left me and Mom with puffed-up, sunburnt lips that rivaled Angelina Jolie’s.  Not to mention that my face is lobster red and peeling from ear to ear.

Dad for lunch!

What's new?

Lunch with Wilson on the salar

After the salt flats, I convinced my parents they needed to try public transportation in Bolivia, and so with great trepidation on their behalf we boarded the bus to Potosi.  I had been waiting for the moment my parents’ got to experience a crazy Bolivian bus ride - I hoped they would fear for their lives, and I wasn’t disappointed!  When rounding switchbacks on the unpaved, muddy road on the edge of a cliff it did sort of seem like the front of the bus was hovering in mid-air, and since Mom was in the front seat, she was, naturally, in tears and ready to fly back to Canada.

Just hangin' out in the market in Sucre

The next few days in Potosi, and then Sucre, the capital, were fairly uneventful.  Unless you count getting “Bolivia Belly” and having your mom tell the hotel staff and other guests that you’ve had diarrhea for the past two days as eventful.  Cause that’s what happened.  Things got more exciting in La Paz, where everyone was gearing up for Carnaval.  On a regular day, every street in La Paz is an unofficial market selling everything from raw meat to padlocks to frozen pizzas to teddy bears to erectile dysfunction herbs.  For Carnaval things get ramped up a notch and people flood the streets selling confetti, wigs, firecrackers, water balloons, homemade liquor and candy.  Driving into the city during Carnaval rivaled Hanoi or Bangkok for craziness.  Mom was traumatized enough to threaten to refuse to leave the hotel room.  Zoinks!

Crazy La Paz

Just one of the many interesting things for sale in La Paz

Anyway, we’ve since parted ways, Mom & Dad went off to hunt anacondas and brave shaman cleansing in the jungle in Peru while I’m on my way to a farm in Bolivia to get my hands dirty with some physical, volunteer labour!  Wish me luck.